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Middle-class bro... Who got knocked to a different life...

He has taken the responsibility of his family on his shoulder at the age of 25. Had to lock his dream and leave the key unfound. Because he had to. Take care of his father's medical situation, aging mother. Have to take care of his sister's education and marriage. Had to say no to friends, fun, and the normal life of a 25. He can't get angry with anyone, nor rest or get good sleep. But he did love a girl unconditionally all through the pain, And was there for her, traveling miles to meet and spare some time with her, for much-needed rest. Sometimes he did share pain and anger with her.. because he know the hug after that, Would heal his pain. He didn't have anyone other than she is his whole world to heal. He trusted all her words when she said she will never leave him.  That same boy today is now 27, Single. Who is taking care of his ill health father without a fall out in checkup, an aging mother with pride, educated his sisters to become Professor He made sure, that
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New Year....

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 Life shuttles you in every way....   The emptiness that you made in my life is like a cancer.. it is not healing.. It going way beyond cancer.. I know without giving and alert it would swallow me. and i will be save from this suffering... You know me... you loved me... you cared me.... you changed me.... and now you don't know me... I feel suffocation... I feel I'm dead .... i'm trying to catch some breath,  you know what ever you are doing is wrong and more tears are yet to be shed.. You know you will be safe with me .. But you are not willing. New year is not a gift for me and you to feel the same .. but its a hope for me where .. you will accept me... take me back pooja.. let's live the dream of us. Give one last chance....
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i know....

I know thinks are not going the right way that you dream for... I know that you are unable to get ride of me...  I too feel it.. I gets awake with you voice in sleep..  I feel the inner voice that you still want me to reach out...  But you should realise one think its.. You who blocking me... And its you who stopping your happiness...  You are afraid that giving me a chance would hurt me more... But you know that it won't happen.. I will never be able to hurt you anymore....  I now have opened my self to accept any challenges.. Because I'v reached a point.. I feel that i don't need any love like the way you satisfied...  I'm in deep love with you...  I had a dream that we are getting a chance to meet again from a beach.. Or seashore resort.. Something place like that..... One day you are gonna realise it.. And you should stop searching me in another person.. You know we both are unique.. The way we are...  What it take cost now is Just a text to me... It delayed.. More
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You are searching for me...

 These are the thinks that i feel and what i'm doing... I feel that every conversation that you are having with anyone , without even knowing you are searching for me... Because that what i'm trying to do. i know you are trying to find a comfort zone, just like the one you had with me... and you are not seeing me.. that i'm just missing you like crazy. And you have already started doubting your so called FB love and you have started feeling insecurity.. You may denie it now: but that's what you are trying to do. You was really happy with me and you know we always had the key for our happiness.. What you are about to doo the same think , that i'm doing.... Loved someone who touched your soul and body ,,, and gonna act happy to another just to live like mind slaughter. we both are in same page... and pain. what it take is correct everything is with us.. A decent strong hug, closed eyes and a loud cry .... No sorry .. No hurts... No Pain..  Just us.. we can flip whole
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you know you miss me....

I feel it...  You are feeling unsafe and too much of thinking going through your mind...  Yep... You know our feelings are strong and stronger...  I know you are getting the sense of lonlyness..  Yes.. Me too... Sometime i wanna text you and say.. " Hey paruuuu miss you babe... I love you soo much... Shall we hang out...?" But its again in my draft...  You know you will be happy... I know your moods... Like no bodies knows.. You know i can make you laugh like the end of the day... We used to do it... Right... All those funny faces... Childish talks... Paruummma, appuchuuu, dhoorandhm, shituuu, bablooooo, muthumani... Its all in your finger tip.  Do you think anyone would step with you the way i did... Noo never.. No body will... Because no body will be me... You know it very well.. That's where you fall in for me...  Don't think too much... Let's do it correctly this time...  Just come back babe..... Let's live a happy life out of online... 
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you still have space....

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These people are my heaven... These people is all i have..  And this is what i have offered you..  You loved them...  This is what you always wanted....  They have accepted you as well....  And these people still have a space left for you... Because we don't replace people..  Just like i did you always had your own space.. Because they loved you so much like i do..  You will never feel alone in here... I know your greatest fear is getting left alone....  I know you are getting left alone, thinks are not changing the way it changed before... You still have the restart and resume button... Because i still waiting for you.... This is the heaven... Being with them is more happy... You still have space between us... All you have to do is... Take a deep breath... Clean your mind and dial me...  Just come back home.... 
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Happy Christmas

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I have never missed to be with you...  You know that...  Its ok now you don't need me..  But i have lifetime memories.. And you hold the other side of my memories to...  I was weak.. But we both where strong... 
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